One of my favorite comedy bits that Eugene Mirman does during his act is when he reads his hate mail on stage. It's how he recites them in that way that makes him sound that he's agreeing sarcastically that makes it high comedy.
So in interest of equal time, I combed through my inbox and reader comments to pick out some well-informed opinions.
This one came in yesterday from reader Scott, who took time from updating his Facebook status to respond to my review of Dan Deacon's set at the Philly Popped! Festival. The show took place just nine months ago.
Chris, you sound like the shittiest person I've never met. You don't have a clue about what you are talking about and you sound like a bitter loser who tries to be a hipster but the hipsters don't even like you, so you have to compensate by talking shit about people that are having more fun than you.
It was also really cool that you told us how good your taste in music is, then proceeded to namedrop the only bands that you can sterotype as techno, to describe music that ISN'T techno. How can you think your opinion even matters if you've seen the Gorillaz in concert over four times? You probably listen to Conor Oberst nonstop because he's the only one that understands you because you're so damn complicated and no one understands you right? There's a million other douche bags like you who can list off the same exact bands you say you like before you can say American Apparel. And aren't you a little old to be doing this? You're 34, but talk and dress like you're 19. The only thing more sad than that is your ability to write.
I honestly can't believe anyone could have written something so ugly about someone as positive as Dan.
I guess that means he's not coming to my show. Can I ask you folks something, how should a 34-year old dress? Should I start going to Kohl's or something? I can get some pleated khakis and golf shirts.
From Joey about my post on American Top 10:
you are a loser
Youuuuuuuu'rrrrrreeee riiiiiight, Joey. Sorry, man. Also a response to that post from Matt:
Hate to play the obvious card, but you're full of yourself to call something "crap" when you admittedly haven't listned to it.
Please send me a Taylor Swift CD and I'll be sure to listen to it.
From reader Damon Albarn, who writes in response to my Morrissey post and the film Let the Right One In:
I am embarassed that you are a fan of my band. Please discontinue listening to us.
Appreciated.
- Damon Albarn
Gosh, D. After all we've been though. At least he said please.
From reader P., who takes issue with my Top 5 list about redundant things in music news.
You should add a #6 to your list - Whiners who complain and blog about what others are doing.
Maybe you can add a #7 while you're at it - bloggers who take themselves too seriously and end up sounding like pretentious numpties. "...and the people in the know (example, me)..." Give it a rest. Honestly. Just because you claim to have heard about a band before anyone else, doesn't mean you are "cool."
No, wait, add a #8 - bloggers who can't be bothered to proof read anything they post.
No. 6: Complaining is the life blood of the internet. No. 7: Believe me, I don't blog to be cool. Nothing cool about being a blogger. No. 8: I'm too busy taking myself seriously to proof read my work.
A reader pointed this out about comments on the BrooklynVegan post on Glasvegas's Bowery Show
Why would any of you refer to anything said buy Music Snobbery. That guy is an even bigger fool then most of you and that is no easy accomplishment. My sister's friends mentally retarded kid brother knows more about music than him.
Yes, Buy MusicSnobbery! I like that idea. Collected the whole set! Trade them with your friends.
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