I get it. Cruises are for old people and dopey couples. So bringing hipsters, scenesters and a bunch of rock types onto them makes it ironic. Ta-daaaaaahhh. And then we can't ponder the nature of rock cruises and it makes lovely press on Pitchfork. Some intern will write a loving piece on the weekends filled with photos of pale skinny frumpy girls in Ray-Bans and bad tattoos mugging for the camera.
Give me a damn break, Golden Voice. Cruise ships should be for cruising. Rock shows should be in rock venues. Hiring Pulp to play on a cruise ship is demeaning, even if you front load it with other bands like Hot Chip, !!!, Warpaint, etc. You're just cheapening the Coachella brand and making a mockery of the bands playing the weekends. Do you think the ship will have a top of the line soundsystem? Doubt it.
Let me tell you about cruise ships and cruise vacations in general. They are the anti-traveling. Traveling should be about exploring different countries and cultures, discovering people, places and foods and being free to make your journey. You can't do any of that on a cruise ship. My parents forced me to go one when I was teenager and it was a nightmare. The food sucks because it's all buffets. You're stuck in the same area. When you get off, you have a limited amount of time to do something. The other passengers are dickheads. The design of the cruiseships are fake and gaudy.
Now, who do you think is going to spend $500 minimum for a weekend? Not me, not you, especially when we have lives in December. Good luck getting to Ft. Lauderdale and finding reasonable airfare. Those who can afford to drop that coin in this cold wintery economic climate are not the people you would want to hang out with in a confined space. Enjoy hanging with bros with popped collars.
If you go, you'll end up spending about $1,000 on top of the ticket/cabin price. You know, if you have that money to spend, go to Europe and see a festival over there. Go to Iceland for Iceland Airways. Go to Oslo for Oya Festival. Benicassim in Spain. Croatia, Latvia, Slovenia, anywhere you wouldn't normally think to see music. You'll have a blast -- better then hanging with a bunch of dickheads going to the Caribbean.
I don't think this Coachella on water thing will sell very well. My only hope is that Pulp will stop by NYC again in December.






David Foster Wallace on cruises:
http://harpers.org/media/pdf/dfw/HarpersMagazine-1996-01-0007859.pdf
Posted by: John V. | July 18, 2012 at 09:02 AM